hurt

I have always thought that since then, I wouldn't feel intensely anymore. Yes, I do get moody, confused..but never so hurt in the way..it hurts to breathe. Hurts to feel my heart beating. Hurts to cry.

So now I know, I'm not that unfeeling afterall.

I wonder if she knows she's the only one who can truly inflict such pain on me. If only..I could diminish that hatred in her. It hurts to look into her eyes.

Because..each time I'd only see anger, disappointment, contempt.


Before she left, she threw my stuff all over the room, smashed the keyboard repeatedly (thank goodness the laptops's still working),and hollered at me.
I tried telling myself, it's okay, really. I tried disguising my hurt clearing the mess.

But I still can't stop those pangs from coming back.

Well, I've just found she's changed the laptop password. After I shut this down, I will not be able to access it again. But I won't be asking her. This is weird I know, but I'm just going to pretend that I have no idea and nothing's happened.




I will wait.