so tears are rolling down my cheeks.. all over again and again and again..
i just don't understand. why. these things always happen to me.
When i saw the ODAC list posted up, and my name wasn't there.. all the things just came hitting me like a blow. Right there straight in my face. and all past memories just came flying back. this listing meant so much to me. i pinned 99% of my hopes on it and just 1% on canoe. i tried so hard to redeem myself for not doing the caterpillar. i did everything i could. i screamed. i initiated. i led. i followed.
Yet.
where were you when i needed you most?
"i have lessons. bye."
"why are you crying over such a little thing? trying to attract attention is it?"
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